Friday, March 6, 2009

more on heaven

caught you

I have been longing for heaven lately. Longing to circumvent the obstacles of this life. Longing to see God face to face without this veil of deceitful flesh. Longing to escape the pressure, the expectations, the temptations, and the hurts.

But my longing for heaven might be misguided. It has been reaping a harvest of sorrow in me. It is not necessarily worldly sorrow, but neither is it Godly sorrow that leads to joy.

I think that real hope in heaven should create a selflessly joyful existence. If someone is absolutely convinced that they are destined for eternity with the Creator of the Universe, this life becomes but a breath. There should be no wallowing in self pity or discontent. There cannot exist pride or selfishness in someone who lives completely in God's salvation. Only joy should survive. That doesn't mean that there will be no more trouble, just that the response to it is one of surrender. Circumstances cannot touch the joy of someone who's treasure is truly in eternity.

So what is the difference between a longing for heaven that reaps sorrow and a longing for heaven that reaps joy?

Faith. I lack faith. I don't believe enough in the goodness of God or the reality of heaven. I am still trying to get the most I can out of this life and lamenting over what I cannot. And all this while knowing that the things of this world cannot fully satisfy. "Woe to the lukewarm Christian for neither can he fully enjoy God nor sin."

"My soul languishes for Your salvation,
I wait for Your word.
Revive me according to Your lovingkindness
So that I may keep the testimony of Your mouth."
-Psalm 119:81,88

"I do believe; help my unbelief."
- Mark 9:24

"If you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain 'move from here to there' and it will move, and nothing will be impossible to you."
-Matthew 17:20

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